Why Do You Write?
Before we get into today’s article, I want to share a poem that I wrote a while ago called: Why Do You Write?
Tears flow from red eyes as she sits and stares at the screen.
Her fingers hang poised, just shy of tapping the keys.
“Why do you write?”
With no answer to give, no explanation to satisfy, her fingertips tap and type.
No passion, no love, no light, no life.
Pressing forward, moving on, her fingers stumble across the keyboard.
A thick fog engulfs her mind.
The words blur beyond recognition.
The machine hums.
Water falls.
Her heart aches.
“Why do you write?”
A cruel question.
Pain plays tricks on her imagination.
Failure after failure finds her thoughts.
It’s not enough. Never enough.
Keep writing—keep posting. Publish and market.
“Stay on target.” “Hit your word count.” “You can’t afford to fail.”
Her heart flickers and fades.
A candle burning out.
She clings desperately to hope.
Wishing to rekindle the spark.
“Why do you write?”
She shuts her eyes in agony. She whispers to the screen. “I don’t know,” she admits. “I don’t know.”
Agony turns to anger, anger fades to anguish, then annoyance settles in.
She dries her eyes and clears her mind.
She types, and she taps.
The answer still eludes her.
But a call cannot be ignored.
“Why do you write?”
Her fingers fly faster. An answer starts to form.
A reason? No, a reminder.
A reminder that she already knows.
Giving Up VS Pushing Forward
This poem is an amalgamation of all the times I’ve ever wanted to give up on writing.
Maybe it’s because I’m having trouble writing a particular story, or I’m deep in a round of difficult edits, or maybe I’m just having a rough time in my personal life and it’s affecting my motivation and other aspects of my work.
Either way, it can become really hard for me to keep writing when I forget—or ignore—why I write in the first place.
I didn’t become an author because I thought it would be easy. If I did, I would have quit two years ago when I had the perfect opportunity (and excuse) placed in front of me.
Answering The Call
In the spring of 2021, God called me to write full-time.
At the time I didn’t know why, or what exactly I was supposed to do with that calling (and honestly I still don’t understand everything), but above all else, I wanted to be obedient.
And that’s when I realized that being obedient is terrifying, because it means letting go of control—something that I’ve valued a little too much throughout my entire life.
The unknown scares me, and a huge part of being a full-time author (especially an indie author) involves facing the unknown.
What if I don’t sell enough books and don’t make enough money to publish new ones? What if an editing or proofreading client isn’t happy with my work? And what if all my marketing attempts fail? Or what if I heard wrong and God didn’t actually call me to be a writer?
Never Alone
Between money troubles, marketing headaches, family emergencies, distractions, and plenty of disappointments, the last few years have shown me that I will never be able to control the world around me—nor should I want to.
When God called me to write, he didn’t just fling me into a scary desert to fend for myself.
In fact, there has never been a moment when I’ve faced the unknown alone. God has been by my side every step of the way—from the moment that I started down this path, to the moment I published my first book, and even right now as I’m writing this post.
The Weight Of The World
God never intended for me to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, but that’s what I do every time I try to take the world out of his hands to control it.
I don’t want to make things unnecessarily complicated. God called me to be a writer—not a weightlifter. So every time I find myself feeling the way I described in the poem above, it means I need to take a step back and evaluate.
Why am I feeling burnt out? Have I made any effort to re-spark my creativity? And most importantly…am I following God’s calling, or am I trying to create my own?
Before You Go…
And with all that said, I’d love to hear from you!
Why is it that you write? And what do you do when you find yourself tempted to give up?
Let me know down in the comments!
(Or, if you’re struggling to find your “Why?” then check out this article)
Also, I’ve officially begun posting to my YouTube channel!
I’m only posting short-form content at the moment, but in the future I’ll be posting long-form content and podcasts.
So be sure to check it out!
This really spoke to me, Thirzah! I’ve been in a similar place and so this article is very encouraging. Thank you! <3
I’m so glad that you found this article encouraging Bella, thank you for letting me know! 💜
Wow, Thirzah, this was perfect timing. Literally yesterday I realized the reason I’m struggling so much is that I don’t feel like I believe in what I’m doing anymore.
Or, at least, I’ve believed in not failing and to-do lists more than the power of stories and the awe of creating with God.
Thanks for sharing the encouragement vulnerably. It’s so helpful.
I’m so glad to hear you say that, Vella! I almost didn’t post this article because I wasn’t sure it would actually be helpful, so I’m really happy to see that so many people have found it encouraging.
Hi Thirzah! Honestly this was so encouraging to know that other writers struggle with things like this. There was a time not that long ago when I was asking myself very similar questions. But thankfully I’ve rediscovered my purpose again.
I want to create stories that touch other people’s lives as much as stories have touched me, and I want to show the glory of God through my work to others. That’s my goal. And I also write because it allows me to step out of my world and experience and discover things I would never be able to otherwise.
Thank you for your emails and I’ll definitely check out your YouTube channel!
Hi Alyssa! I’m so glad that you found this article encouraging, and I absolutely love your “whys”/purpose! My “whys” are actually quite similar to yours! And thank you for checking out my YouTube channel, I really appreciate it!
Your poem is absolutely amazing Thirzah. I feel all those emotions. Thank you for sharing this. You are amazing! Having said this: Keep going!!! Keep writing! YES! Let’s!
Awww thank you so much, Joanna! I’m so glad that you liked my poem! And yes, absolutely! Let’s keep writing!!!
My biggest problem: self-doubt. Sometimes it looks like perfectionism. Sometimes it looks like focusing on all the writing rules to the point where I hate actually writing. Sometimes it’s like today as I was working on my first draft, thinking about all the plotholes and all the ways I was just spitting out words and not taking time to craft them well.
(In the case of today, I reminded myself that it’s still the first draft and ended up adding five new pages to my chapter, over two thousand words, in a little over an hour. So, yes, it’s still full of inconsistencies and telling-not-showing, but it’s 1) a little more than yesterday, and 2) still the first draft.)
Absolutely, Sarah! Progress is progress. We can’t edit a story that doesn’t exist yet.
Thirza thanks for asking the question. My easy bake answer was always: “Because I can’t not write.” But the truth was that I was raised in a family so dysfunctional a counselor once labeled it “The Bar Scene in Star Wars.” Writing started as a way to lay hold of sanity, to process many personal and emotional events. This question is inspiring me to write my own post. Thanks for sharing your poem, this post and not giving up on your writing.
Thank you, Juli, I’m so glad that you found this article inspiring! I also used to say that “I write because I can’t not write” and while that’s true, there’s definitely more to it than that. I might actually share my whole experience in an upcoming post. And I hope that you do make a post of your own! I’m sure that other people will find it really encouraging!